What is the secret to ‘great sex’? And when does sex become “making love”? Is there a difference between sex and making love? And if so, what is it?
Here’s what some people said about what they felt having sex means and making love means to them:
Making Love
‘When making love, climaxing is important, too (because it’s always great), but the primary motivation is to connect with your partner’.
‘Making love can mean taking time in exploring your partner’s body, mind, and heart, not just because you are trying to have an orgasm, but because you are sharing a very intimate connection with them’.
‘Making love might take hours, and you may even decide the orgasm wasn’t your goal. It’s all about deepening your connection and communication, growing your love’.
‘I know that I can be myself when I am making love and don’t have to try to be anyone else’.
‘Making love is more communication, its enjoying being with your partner, not just in a sexual way’.
Having Sex
‘When you’re having sex, your primary motivation is to get off and have an orgasm’.
‘You don’t need to love your partner when having sex’.
‘Having sex is more physical and functional. It’s about stimulation’.
‘Sometimes, when I’m having sex, I turn into a different person. It’s more a performance’.
‘Sex is about right and wrong and often trying not to fail or trying to impress’.
Testimonial
Sometimes when I’m having sex, my mind wanders. Whether I fantasize about someone else, a porn scene or something that stimulates me to get more aroused …. I am not all in.
Making love is the complete opposite. I am fully present at every single moment. In fact, there’s no way to make love otherwise. I have to be in the moment with my partner or risk losing the connection and intimate moment with them which they feel.
Sex is generally seen to be more about the physical act and not so much about the relationship and connection with the other person.
Is it possible that the difference between sex and making love is that sex finishes once the physical act is over, but making love is the continuous expression between people? Examples of love-making:
- Being caring with them in any situation
- Appreciating the other and expressing it
- Knowing that you can be yourself with each other the whole time
- Connecting with each other’s eyes when out with others
- Holding hands while walking down the street
So, if you can have sex without making love ... can you make love without having sex? 🤯
Any sexual activity before intercourse is called foreplay. This can include touching, kissing, licking and anything that gets each other sexually aroused.
What if you can have 24/7 foreplay with your partner not sexually, but how you communicate and are with each other…??
If foreplay is attributed to enhancing sex or getting sexual…. is it possible that everyday love-making, which means the loving expressions towards your partner, are like a forever foreplay of a 24/7 loving relationship?
Wow, does that mean that true lovemaking doesn’t only happen with physical and sexual contact?
