Category > Love, Porn, Relationship with yourself
Porn and Intimacy
When someone watches or is addicted to porn relationships become more about sex than intimacy – the relationship is seen more for its potential physical sexual encounter and not for actually connecting with a partner.
You start being a performer in your own relationship, trying to recreate what you see online instead of expressing what you truly feel and like.
Having a greater awareness of our environment and what is around us is key as well as being able to question and not accept everything we see and hear as ‘normal’. Porn isn’t real so if someone watches porn as their way of educating themselves about sex and relationships its going to lead to a false way of relating to and being with partner, making harder to just be themselves.
Remember, love and cherish your body, have and know your boundaries, do what YOU feel and not what the trend says, listen to YOUR body.
Testimonial
Even learning about the exploitation and abuse in porn, I still found it hard to fault and not enjoy it – especially if the women were sexy. Asking myself what the harm was in the fantasy is if they are willing participants?
As I became more aware or how I felt, I started to ask myself what was my role in it? Was I just a consumer who ‘enjoyed the ‘product’ or was I in truth nothing more than the meat in the sandwich – while I was using the woman I was watching to get off on and outplay a fantasy my body was equally being abused aligning to that way of ‘pleasure’ that was hollow, empty and lacking intimacy.
Seeing the hollowness in the actors eyes realizing that every person I was looking at was an empty body that had no sensitivity, sensuality or feelings. I started to realize that it wasn’t just the bodies on the screen that were being abused but also mine. Porn trains you to not live from your sensitivity and to enter a never-ending cycle of seeking more and more without any true satisfaction and settlement in your body.
It’s like in those movies where the beautiful woman turns into a skeletal ghost and when you look at her you also become that same dead body not able to feel or express the love you, in truth, are.
Adam
