We all learn to consent to many things without thinking about it.....
“Consent is to agree. To say YES. To give a clear, audible YES. Specifically as a young woman it is crucial to understand the importance of clearly saying YES.”
- the pressure of being a young woman and being in love
- the pressure of being a young woman in the era of online porn
- the pressure of being a young woman who grew up watching other women submitting to men in TV shows, movies, music videos, etc.
So, what is it to consent ? Is it just saying YES ? Do you know how to give consent ?
The best feeling for any woman is the feeling of having control over what happens to her body and when it happens. It could be just a pat on the back or just a hand on your thigh but it is in your power to say YES, it is okay or NO, it is not okay.
So to what, exactly, am I consenting? To consent is to agree to partake in each and every stage of any interaction.
- The fact that you initially agree to kissing does not automatically mean you agree to sex.
- Or just because you initially agree to sex, it does not mean you cannot opt out at a later stage if you ever feel uncomfortable or don’t feel like it anymore.
Super IMPORTANT: As young women and girls we have been strongly influenced by society to believe that once you opt in you cannot opt out, but you have the right, even after giving consent, to withdraw that consent anytime!
Consent is having control over your very own body!!!
Consent needs to be given at any time and being in a relationship with someone is not an automatic consent card! Being in a relationship should not change your individual boundaries! For example, if you don’t like sending nudes and you are in a relationship with someone who does, it doesn’t mean you have to do it.
Consent is communication...
Consent requires communication at ALL stages.
Communicating: what do I feel in my body, what do I feel comfortable with, what do I want. Is it ok for that person to be close to me? Talking about what you like and don’t like, want and don’t want can help you to have more comfortable and enjoyable experiences of touch – including sex.
You should never feel that you owe someone something, particularly anything sexual and if you do ever feel pressured about anything then speak with someone you can trust.
Learn about how we are coerced and
pressured into sexual situations when
we are not ready for them.
If someone is sexual with another person in any way and the other person has not given consent then it is sexual abuse, assault or rape.