What if intimacy is more than this?
Like any relationship it first starts with us and how intimate we are with ourselves.
We are not talking about masturbation, although it might be what first comes to the mind.
Intimacy is about allowing ourselves to feel the sensitivity within us, as a strength and being who we are, no matter what.
Our feelings and honoring what we feel can be part of this intimacy with ourselves.
We currently live in a world where we don’t learn to truly connect and express our feelings. Often, we don’t even really know what we feel as we are so imposed on by what we should feel, do and think, that we may not know what connection or feeling intimacy really is!
Then, when we start to explore our sexuality, we may try to use sex to feel that connection and intimacy with ourselves. When we are with another person and want to connect with them, we automatically go to thinking that it can only be done through being sexual. And intimacy can be sexual, but sex cannot bring us connection and intimacy if we don’t hold that within ourselves first.
Intimacy is really loving ourselves from the inside out and being comfortable with showing ourselves for who we are!
Then you can share more of who you are with others. It doesn’t just have to be through talking, but also in which way you take care of things. Being intimate with yourself can help you develop deeper personal connections with friends, family, partners etc.
And yes, in some cases, this may be a romantic relationship.
Developing intimacy with your partner is opening a deeper part of you to your partner and speaking about what’s going on for you, being honest with how you feel…
Opening to deeper part of you is becoming aware of how you are not only with yourself but how you are with others too.
- How do you speak to/with others?
- Do you go into reactions, protection and/or get defensive?
- Are there elements of being controlling, pushing the person away or feeling you are unable to express yourself?