Category > Love, Relationships, Sex, Love & Relationships
WE GET TAUGHT WHAT "LOVE" IS
How do we learn love? How do we learn how to be in a relationship or what to expect of a relationship?
Think about it, you are not born knowing how to date, but you kind of sort it out from your family, the movies you watch, the books you read, TV-shows and even strangers around you. We observe all of this and learn “Oh, so that’s how it is! That’s how it’s done!”
Most of this love we see in films and the media in general is what is called Romantic Love.
But how does it work?
Romantic love tells us the specific roles for men and women and what these should look like. Romantic love relies on a series of ideals/stereotypes of how relationships should work and how each person in this relationship should act and behave. These false ideals and beliefs include things like “romantic love is the only source of happiness” or “the love for the other person comes first”.
In heterosexual relationships the boy gets the strong, independent, protective and dominant role, the girl learns that she needs to be delicate, feminine, loving and submissive.
These roles can also be played out in same sex relationships.
Whatever our age is we always get the same message – romantic love is the medicine that cures everything and if we don’t find that person, we feel like something is missing, don’t we?
But, is that really what love is about? Can our happiness and contentment really come from another person?
While healthy relationships can be really supportive it is key to love ourselves first.
TOP 5 MYTHS ABOUT ROMANTIC LOVE:
- THE BETTER HALF: There is only one person who is destined to be your partner. You just need to find each other. The rest will simply happen. And if you are not with that person you are not complete.
- LOVE HURTS: Love means suffering and sacrifice. Despite the intensity of the conflicts between the couple, love will prevail, & you should do whatever it takes to make it work.
- JEALOUSY IS A SIGN OF LOVE: If you are jealous, that only shows how much you care about your partner and if you are not jealous that means you don’t care enough.
- LOVE IS FOREVER: The belief that once we have found true love it is forever and we have to stay in the relationship no matter what.
- REAL LOVE MUST BE SHARED (ONLINE): If you are really in love, you should share that love with everyone. If a relationship is good it must be shown on social media. “If its not posted it doesn’t exist”.
