Drunk sex.. What if I don’t have any memory the next day? Was that violence?

The definition of sexual consent states that a person must agree by choice to sexual activity and that they have the freedom and capacity to make that choice.
Alcohol or drugs affect our ability to be clear with decision and choice making and in having the capacity to choose. If anyone has blackouts, confusion, loss of bodily control, slurred speech or loss of consciousness they are not able to consent to any form of sexual activity.
So, for you it is important to reflct on why you drank so much that you cannot remember what you were doing. First of all, did you choose to have too much to drink or did someone ‘made you drunk’? Any situation where you lose control over your body is a potential danger to be abused and putting yourself willingly into such a situation is a huge self-abuse.


For more support and advice, you can also sign up to one of our Support Groups and share a space with other young people where we can look at how to take care of ourselves and our bodies.

You also should go to your nearest sexual health centre and speak with a professional about this further. It may be that you also need to get tested for sexually transmitted infections or if applicable take emergency contraception.